I've been busy lately, extremely busy. My procrastination with law review finally caught up to me this weekend, compounded by a corporations midterm today. I'm not usually one to fault teachers for the duplicity of exams, but in this case, I will. Although I feel like I did well on the exam, what she told us to study was definitely not the focus. Frustrating.
It's been a taxing couple weeks, for multiple reasons I suppose. As aforementioned, school is definitely kicking up a bit. That's always been to be expected though. A friend mentioned to me tonight that graduate school is school for people to go to who haven't quite realized that they're done with school. At this point, that saying is equally applicable to law school. Thankfully, mercifully, fall break is a mere 17 hours away. Yes, I know my fall break will be fraught with law review peril, but at least it will be some sort of break.
For me, the real break is in a week and a half. I'm going down to visit some friends in Decorah, which I think is long overdue and plenty welcome. It's time to get out of this city, to get someplace a bit more pastoral. I wouldn't say that our get-together's are mournful for the past, for the good old days of college. I don't think any of my friends has that sort of stagnant view of life. But what I would say is they remind me of how fortunate I was to have that period of time, and to have good friends. So yes, that will be good.
I'm not one to make this site some sort of repository of my private thoughts, at least those private thoughts that go to the core of relationships. So, there aren't any proper names of individuals here, there aren't any "dear diary" entries, there isn't much amorous poetry or vindictive diatribes. In general, I am a private person; someone who likes to control the amount of information I divulge about given situations to given people.
In light of that disclaimer, I will stay true to it. But what I will say, is that the past month and a half or so have presented me with a sort of personal-relational challenge, something that I don't normally encounter. Maybe challenge isn't the correct word. Maybe the better term is an ambiguous opportunity, made worse by my own shy and non-assertive nature. Actually, maybe the best explanation is the uncertainty of approaching something that you want so bad to turn into something else, but not knowing exactly what to do. Maybe realizing that what you have to do, just maybe, is wait. Or to the contrary, maybe you have to do something drastic. As it turns out, perhaps "uncertainty" is the key term here.
I get the sneaking suspicion that however terrible/joyful/confusing the whole range of emotion is, it's nothing unique to me. I think it's just the terrible/joyful/confusing nature of our own interactions. In any event, it doesn't make it any less emotionally draining.
Fall is certainly here, maybe even with a quick skip into winter. I was listening to Garrison Keillor on the radio the other day, and he said something to the effect that fall is a perfect time to think about mortality. Now, I haven't been thinking about mortality. But I think there's some truth to that thought, fall (at the very least) encourages you to think about some of the bigger issues in life. I can agree with that.
On a final note, I can't recommend enough last week's episode of The Office. It's Jim and Pam's wedding episode, but it is also absolutely hilarious.
Almost 16 hours to fall break now.
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